After recovering from an eight-and-a-half-hour cancer surgery, the words humble and bold were often on my mind, and then God started writing them on my heart. While my body was going through some major physical adjustments and healing, my spirit was really undergoing a major overhaul. It was as if God had been operating on my attitude. He definitely was refining my soul and showing me things that (as much as I didn't want to see) I needed to see. I had been holding onto resentments, and foolishly believing I had the right to do so. I also hid a lot of my thoughts and convictions behind southern politeness and political correctness, which caused inner turmoil that wasn't healthy either. It led to outbursts from time to time, because when you hold things in for too long, it has a way of surfacing.
During my recovery, I kept saying, "We're all so fragile and don't realize it!" to my friends and family, as they visited me during my two weeks stay in the hospital. The awesome realization that the Lord gives our hearts the ability to beat for a certain number of days, resonantly changed me for good. Time is a gift to be used wisely, and all our time here on earth is relatively short, whether we believe it or not. This moved me to write down what I had seen God doing in my life and to share with those needing encouragement.
After confessing and repenting of the things that needed to change, I noticed such a peace and joy in my thoughts. It was shortly after, that my husband and I went on an evangelical outreach involving several different ministries coming together. During the prayer time, one of the speakers from International House of Prayer, Hazen Stevens, prayed the words, "humble and bold" right over me out loud. As soon as I heard those two words together in that order, I felt God revealing to me that this was the name I was to use for my blog.
In the fall of 2014, I was given a book by the Women's Ministry at Perimeter church, where I work. It was Timothy Keller's The Freedom Of Self-Forgetfulness and again, it was if God was speaking directly to my heart about how to move forward in a new season of my life. This book takes a close look at the ego in all of us, yet reveals how to ascertain an unexplainable joy that our egos cannot grasp.
In January of 2015, humbleandbold.com began, and like a child craving their parent's approval, I was hoping for another nudge of assurance that I was following His will. Checking again, like I had searched so many times before to make sure the name was not already in use, I came across this video by Timothy Keller and it was a huge confirmation and a sweat kiss from my Father, The King, who had led me to this video the night before my first blog went out there. It was the third confirmation and reminded me of how Jesus, three times, asked Peter if he loved Him. If you know the story of how Peter denied Him three times, then you grasp the importance of Jesus giving Peter three more chances to declare his love for Him. So thankful that God gives us new opportunities to glorify Him, even after we have gotten it wrong!
It has now been a year since I published my first blog post! I can honestly say I never dreamed of blogging. How can you dream of something you never were really aware of until later in your adult life? What I did dream of was using my creative gifts and talents in a meaningful way, that would impact people's lives for the better. Funny how God uses our dreams and brings them to pass in ways that we never would have imagined. He is good like that!
What dreams has God given you and how have you seen Him working in your life?
Stay humble & BOLD!
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 King James Version (KJV)
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